Harrow Bluers Premier XI: No matchup received from the office of the Matchup Commissioner

Harrow Bluers 2nd String: Old Berkham's Head, Harrow High School Field Turf, 2pm GMT, 9am Eastern Standard Time

TEAM STATZ:

• 13th matchup, 8th domestic matchup
• 3rd v 5th in Division 3 of the Arthurian Conference
• Bluers can reach summit with major victory, can slump to 5th ranked if they play like douchebags
• Berkhams will climb above Bluers if they collect the W
• OHAFC current streak: W W L
• Berkham's current streak: W L L
• OHAFC domestic streak this semester: Won 4 Lost 3
• Berkham's road streak this semester: Won 2 Tied 2
• Previous matchup: Bluers 4 Berkham's 0, JLC Round of 16, Feb 25th 2012 (Soya-Inca, Frank Linn, Philly Berry with a deuce, the goalshots)
• No corresponding matchup last semester
• Current points totalizer compared to last semester: now a trio of points more, offence 2 to the good, defence breached 3 less
• Current situation compared to after the same matchups last semester: same totalization of points - 13
• 2nd matchup straight on field turf for the second roster

PLAYER STATZ:

• 33 players from the roster used this semester, 101 in last five semesters
• A-rod Cayterr and Cajun Chop-Punch most matchups attended: 10/12 (0.833)
• A-rod Cayterr swings most matchups started: 10/12 (0.833)
• Maximum Curry with most mins on field in official matchups: 810/1080 (0.750)
• Maximum Curry hottest goalcontainer buster: 6 big ones registered
• Dave Seed the quickest draw in the west: 14 mins when he gone done goalblasted the Bluers in front versus Rick Hamists second string roster on Nov 23rd
• Caramel Amen the majorist felony disciplination combatant: 1 minor felony indication card this semester
• J R Ewing set for 60th appearance in all tournaments
• Cajun Chop-Punch set for 50th 1st team selection for second roster in League matchups
• Jacky Robin's son set for 25th appearance in all tournaments
• Maximum Curry set for 20th 1st team selection for second roster in League matchups

Harrow Bluers 3rd string: Old Forest Trees, Harrow High School Field Turf, 12 noon showdown

TEAM STATZ

• 11th matchup, 7th domestic matchup
• 6th v 5th in Division 5 of the Arthurian Conference
• Bluers can overtake opponents with victory, cannot drop a ranking even if they play like total douchos
• OHAFC current streak: W L L
• Forest Tree's current streak: D L D
• OHAFC domestic streak this semester: Tied 1 Lost 5
• Forest Tree's road streak this semester: Won 2 Lost 3
• Previous matchup: Bluers lost 4 to 3 on November 9th at Harrow Ball Club Philly Athletic Field (Eddy Page, Al Schmidt Jr & a retarded goalstrike into his own goalcontainer by some lame-o)
• No corresponding matchup last semester
• Current points totalizer compared to last semester: now a deuce of points less, offence 8 to the good but defences breached 12 more
• Penultimate road trip for third string roster this semester

PLAYER STATZ

• 33 players from the roster used this semester, 53 in last 1.75 semesters
• Al Allwell and Lazer Corn most matchups attended & started: 9/10 (0.900)
• Al Allwell with most mins on field in official matchups: 795/900 (0.883)
• Al Schmidt Jr & Ben & Jerry Sewell hottest goalcontainer busters: a trio of big ones registered each
• Al Yoghurty the quickest draw in the west: 15 mins when he gone done goalblasted the Bluers in front versus Old Hounds Alien's premier roster on Jan 25th
• Teddy Gordon Sr the majorist felony disciplination combatant: 1 major felony indication card this semester
• J R Ewing & Lazer Corn set to turn out for both 2nd and 3rd string matchups in quick succession - allowable under Arthurian Conference Law
• J R Ewing due to make debut appearance in a third string matchup this semester
• Lazer Corn due to make 15th first team call-up for third string in League competition over past two semesters
• Lee Malinhams & Dave Howelse both running hot in netbusting percentage column right now - 2 goalstrikes in 2 matchups for each lethalizer (1.000)

Random Stat of the Week, in association with Dr Pepper: Top Ten Most Lame-o Soccer Ball Club Names in US:

1. 1.Wilmington Hammerheads

2. 2.Seacoast United Phantoms

3. 3.Virginia Beach Piranhas

4. 4.Los Angeles Misioneros

5. 5.Southern Caifornia Seahorses

6. 6.Bay Area Ambassadors

7. 7.Massachusetts Stingers

8. 8.Chicago Natural Disasters

9. 9.Santa Clarita Blue Heat

10. 10.Detroit Waza

See you next Friday for another Statz Bombardment homies!

Peace out - Word.